Thursday - H came home on Thursday night. He arrived just as I was doing my injections. I could tell he'd been feeling badly about not being home for the first few days of drugs. I was fine, but he still wished he'd of been around. When he walked upstairs he handed me a little package - he'd gift wrapped a surprise. By gift wrapped, I mean he took a paper towel, taped it around the surprise, and wrote "To Risa Love Dan" on the front. I opened it with delight. Inside was a necklace with a little trinket - a small elephant charm. I smiled at how cute it was. "Do you know why I got you an elephant?" he asked. "Um... because the trunk is up and that's good luck," I responded. "No," he said. He didn't know about trunk luck. I guessed again ... "Ohhh mmmmmyyy goooooodness... because you're taking me on an African safari??!!" H laughed. Loudly. I took that as a no. He admired my continual ability to wishfully think in a totally ridiculous yet earnest way. I laughed too - even though I had a pang of disappointment that we weren't going on Safari. Finally he told me - "It's because you're a Republican." I was still completely touched that he'd brought me a gift, but I reminded him it is a little embarrassing to be a Republican right now. So, we agreed to tell people the elephant is for good luck. I gave the little guy a name - he's Mr. Giggle. He made us laugh (during a not so funny injection moment) and I smile now when I look at him. Mr. Giggle has become my good luck charm. I wear him almost everyday.
Friday - SGF began doing daily blood work and ultrasounds. I go every morning at 7am. The drugs haven't caused any major mood swings or crying fits, but the early mornings and the stress of it all does make me tired. Despite that, I'm not sleeping as well as I normally do. My mind races at night - I'm nervous for the trigger shot and all that follows. But, mostly I think about the nurse reports. Every afternoon they give me my estrogen level (it's going up, as it should), the measurements for my endometrial lining (it's getting thicker, as it should), but my follicle count (to me, the most important number) remains unclear. I need to be better about asking exactly what I want to know. Instead, I lay awake at night, with little information, and try to go over all the possible scenarios my follicles may have. If I have 7 (as I did on Friday), then maybe they'll retrieve 5-6 eggs, and maybe 3-4 of those will fertilize, and maybe 1-2 of those will be viable. But, today I thought they told me I had 8 follicles on one side (big ones and small ones). I have no idea how to hypothesize about those. Will only the big ones produce eggs? How many?? Only time will tell. In the meantime, I'm trying to find a way to fall asleep more easily.
(Follicle Goal: As many as possible at 18mm measurement)
Tomorrow is Monday - Monday, Funday. I'm taking my follicles frolicking. I read somewhere that I need to think positively about my insides. So, H, me, and my follicles are going to a party. The office where I work is having an Inauguration Open House. I've never been, but from what I hear it's a nice affair with open bar, passed hors d'oeuvres and the works. Also, since CBS sometimes films from the roof of the office building, I'm hoping that some of the reporters will be there. I LOVE CBS - love 60 minutes, love Scott Pelley, love the morning show. Love Love Love. Not so secretly, I'm plotting to meet Charlie Rose and the gang. I think even the follicles will jump for joy if I get to see some newscaster celebs. Forget the Prez, I'll be looking out for someone else!
I expect on Thursday or so we'll receive instructions to do the trigger shot. Until then, it's a little like groundhog day around here. Get up, get blood drawn, get an ultrasound, get a phone call, get a stat report, get injection instructions. Repeat.
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